Haiku Thursday: SuperBowlku

Katy, Brady, Lynch
sings, throws, runs–respectively
Super Bowl Sunday

#haikuthursday #superbowl #sb49 #football #footballku

Wisdom Wednesday

“There are no limits. There are plateaus, but you must not stay there, you must go beyond them. If it kills you, it kills you.”  –Bruce Lee

#wisdomwednesday

Modern Seinfeld Monday: “The Tip Out”

Kramer decides to help out the homeless by creating a website for “The Contributor” newspaper. His plan backfires since there’s now no reason to sell it, and the homeless now seem like they’re just wasting paper.

Jerry: You gotta shut down the website, Kramer! You’re putting the homeless out of business.
Kramer: But that wasn’t the plan! I was trying to streamline their lifestyle.
Jerry: They’re homeless! There’s no need to streamline, and they have no lifestyle! When you sleep in a cardboard box and eat other people’s leftovers, that’s as “Walden Pond” as you’re gonna get.

Meanwhile, George takes a girl to the swankiest New York restaurant. His jokes are funny, the food is tasty, the wine is flowing freely–everything’s perfect until the server announces that she’s leaving and that she’ll be transferring their ticket to someone else. George decides not to tip the new server because “she didn’t do any work,” which makes his date think he’s cheap.

Girl: Don’t be like that. You should really tip.
George: I’m no miser! I pay if it’s deserved! But where was this new girl when I went hungry? Where was she when my wine glass went empty?
Girl: It’s unfair.
George: No, it’s very fair! The other girl did all the work. I’d hate to give HER money to someone else. I’m the fair one!
Girl: Do what you want, George.
George: Wait, do you really want me to do what I want because usually when a woman says that, it means the opposite.
Girl: *Leans in closely* Do. What. You. Want.

Haiku Thursday 01.22.15

Facebook’s never been
so fun: ‪#‎wisdomwednesday‬‘s the
new ‪#‎haikuthursday‬

#haikuthursday ‪#‎facebook‬ ‪#‎facebooku‬

I guess the above status could be revised to say:

WordPress’ never been

so fun: Wisdom Wednesday’s the

new Haiku Thursday…

Works either way, right?

Wisdom Wednesday 01.21.15

“I believe that they who wish to do easy things without trouble and toil must previously have been trained in more difficult things.” –Rhetorica Ad Herennium

Modern Seinfeld Monday: “The Hip Hop Articles”

Jerry is the token white comic during an urban comedy tour. He’s never performed in front of an all-black audience, so he’s nervous. But his bit about Martin Luther King’s name is well-received, and by the end of the tour, he’s more popular in the black community than in the Jewish community.

Elaine: Worldstarhiphop.com is calling you the Robin Thicke of comedy. They say you could surpass Justin Timberlake by the end of 2015. What did you say at those clubs?

Jerry: I talked about how being a doctor AND a king are two of the best professions ever. And how MLK was both. I then pointed out how even though we don’t have royalty in America, we have no last names related to democracy. Can you imagine? Dr. Martin Luther Senator? Doesn’t make sense.

Elaine: The Urban Daily called you “The White Idris Elba.”

Jerry: Yes, my people love me.

Elaine: Your people? Jerry, you’re Jewish!