Haiku Thursday: “Bird is to Birds as Haiku is to…
Plural of haiku
is haiku, I say haikus
for clarity’s sake…
Archive for May, 2015
Sonnet Sunday: “A Poem for You on Your 65th Birthday”
Thirteen times five—a monumental year,
Multiply that product by two and you
Get 130—Shakespeare’s best sonnet. Here
We see the beauty in numbers. It’s true
That some believe math is invented, not
Discovered, like lab diamonds juxtaposed
With those that are naturally mined. Hot
Days in a lab, in the earth, let’s suppose
It matters not the quality of stone
Where it comes from but who gives and who
Gets it. I care not the rock of my home
If her birthday’s a construct of time to
Mark how we organize our life’s sweet span
But that most was spent making me a man…
Satire Saturday: “Marriage & Disney”
A Los Angeles businessman says that hiring a Disney screenwriter to respond to his wife’s texts & emails has saved his marriage.
Modern Seinfeld Monday: “The Mother’s Day Brunch”
Elaine receives a Mother’s Day card from a coworker because the outfits she’s been wearing make her look pregnant.
Elaine: Can you believe this? Someone got me a card. What do you think of this outfit? Does it look like I’m expecting?
Jerry: Uh…I’m sorry what?
Elaine: This outfit. Does it make me look pregnant?
Jerry: Um…Kramer, get in here! I’m sorry, I have no idea what you’re talking about.
(Kramer Enters)
Elaine: Kramer, does this make me look pregnant?
(Jerry motions for him to say no, but he doesn’t see)
Kramer: Definitely. If I didn’t know any better, I’d wish you Happy Mother’s Day.
George takes his mom out on a Mother’s Day brunch after staying up too late Saturday night. He looks tired and he’s poorly dressed, making him look older than he actually is. Several people mistake them for a couple, which is more than George can bear.
George: Well Jerry, that’s it! I’m out the game!
Jerry: Why? What happened?
George: They thought I was my father. At the brunch, people thought my mom & I were together.
Jerry: You and Estelle Costanza?
George: That’s right, Jerry. There’s no hope.
Jerry: There’s always hope for you, George.
George: Do you really believe that?
Jerry: No.
Sonnet Sunday: “A Sonnet for My Mother on This Day”
May’s second Sunday is but one day and
Yet, we gather ‘round our flower shops, our
Restaurants, one fortnight before the sand
Of pools and beaches mark the summer hour
To pay homage to the giver of life,
Earthly hub of human spring, from you springs
Forth the fruit of birth, the flow’r of right
And wrong is first known, as we grow, life sings
Through the notes of childhood, adolescence
Then finally, adulthood—the chorus
Constant refrain is, go forth life’s essence
Continue that which was begun in us
So although it’s but only one May day,
Thank you Giver, Singer, this Mother’s Day.
Haiku Thursday: “White-Out”
Ashley, you can’t just
white-out the test questions you
don’t want to answer…
#haikuthursday #examweek #test #britishliterature #britlit
Modern Seinfeld Monday: “The Boxing Match”
Jerry is asked to replace Chris Rock at a Vegas show. He’s excited for the opportunity, until he realizes his set is during the same time as the Mayweather-Pacquiao fight. George & Kramer promise to come to his show & skip the fight, but they both stand him up.
George gets hot at a blackjack table and decides to let it ride. He does so well that they believe he’s counting cards, so casino security “has a little talk” with him in one of the back rooms.
Kramer wins a hotel raffle for fight tickets, so he ditches Jerry’s show. As a joke, he decides to put on a Burger King king suit that he finds near an elevator. He’s escorted to Mayweather’s locker room where he walks to the ring with Beiber & the rest of the Money Team.
Elaine decides to have a girls only weekend at Jerry’s apartment. She spills an expensive pinot noir on his couch cushion. So what does she do? Flips it over to hide the stain.
nickxsavestheday 
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